If I Was A Business Lady

If I was a business lady

I would wear those

Human barlae (?)

I hate the colour nostalgia

Grandma's lampshade - army/foliage

Stock foundation colour iridescent snakeskin

Oh look at these - stunning

Prostitutes lips camo ever not tacky?

And how much are they

Look like a different person

Stripper shoes = clear heels

Lavendar

Only shoes during sex

Sweatpant shopper cork

These are kinda cute

OMG it's a jaguar not a fan

Neat, intense, heinous

Foot collar darling

How is it that I have been in NYC for five days and I still haven't stepped foot inside a shoe store? My current footwear could not be more impractical for the daily activities that apartment hunting require - I finally understand what 'pounding the pavement' means. My body aches and my feet are blistered, my shoes have holes in the bottoms, the leathers are stained from rainy Vancouver days, but I hadn't even considered going into a shoe store until I came across a page in my journal from last year when I was researching my shoe-themed dance piece 'The Collectors' with now-defunct dance collective actualPLAY.

I've trying to write in my journal every day - just observations mostly. Trying to stick to my goal of writing something for this blog at least every 3 days. This particular page in my journal is close to the front - I always flip past it on my way to a clean sheet of paper. It lists everything that my friends Lucia and Sarah or I uttered and mumbled to ourselves while we were browsing the shoe section at Holt Renfrew. It now reads like a sort of bizarre poem, equal parts immediate visual observation and visceral gut reaction.

I suppose I haven't been shopping for several reasons, some more obvious than others. Firstly, I have no money. Secondly, I have more important things to be acquiring, like a home or a job. There is an underlying fear that I will see the perfect pair and I will be forced to buy them regardless of the consequences. There is the irrational fear that I will have the self-control to stop myself from buying them and always regret not buying them.

These shoes might not even exist. But I want them.

-BO